Feature: Replay-tionships

REPLAY-TIONSHIPS
Serious Relationship Vs. Marriage


Committed Relationship- No Definition Found

Marriage- Is a social, spiritual, and/or legal union of individuals. This union may also be called matrimony, while the ceremony that marks its beginning is usually called a wedding and the married status created is sometimes called wedlock.

Boyfriend- Is a person's regular male companion in a romantic or sexual relationship, which falls short of a long-term committed (eg. marital) relationship.

Girlfriend- Is a term that can refer to either a female partner in a non-marital romantic relationship.

Husband- A man who is married.

Wife- A married woman.

When it comes to relationships, I think my man from the Stylistics with the high voice said it best when he led in the song with “ Tell me what’s wrong with you now, tell me why I never seem to make you happy, though heaven knows I try, what does it take to please you”. While in this particular song it is a man talking to a woman, we all know that in relationships either person can find themselves echoing this sentiment.

For anybody who has ever been in a relationship, I challenge you to answer this question:
What is the difference between a committed/serious relationship and marriage? And don’t try to cop out and say a ring, because we all know, that the ring alone is not good enough (LOL). I am looking for somebody to tell me what the different dynamics of a serious relationship opposed to marriage are.

For example, things like honesty, loyalty, responsibility, commitment, and trust are all things that are supposed to constitute a relationship. I understand, and agree to that. However the question I raise is; are there different levels to these principals? And if so what are they? In today’s society I am confused on the difference between the two, and when I ask people what those differences are; they look at me with this “Ohh Damn” face.

Granted, there are a lot of things that the two share, but I guess what I am searching for, are the differences. Work with me on this one.

Sometimes in life you develop your solutions by knowing what NOT to do. You remember when you were in school and you took a multiple choice test and there were two answers that looked right and one that made you say “I know that shit ain't right”, and you then guessed between the other two (I used to do that all the time by the way). This is the prudence that I speak of. Without this judgement you could find yourself replaying the same mistakes over and over, because you do not know what is right or wrong.

So I attempted to answer my own question. While racking my brain I understood why people were giving me that “Ohh Damn” face. Upon my long deliberation I only managed to come up with one counter, and that was EXPECTATION.

Expectations can get you in a lot of trouble. Man, I can give you a dissertation on how man times I have disappointed myself with “high expectations”. At any rate, as it applies to a relationship I think that expectations must be layed out to one another open and honestly. So each one of you know where each other stands.

Therefore, you can cover yo ass when it comes to your partner trying to check you, or on the flipside your partner can constitute checkin yo ass, if you don’t carry your weight. I must admit, that us fellas seem to fall short of doing this, and often get checked, (and for the record it has happened to me many many times lol) I have since adopted this theory of expectations in my personal relationship repertoire, and would suggest you do the same.

I think that due to expectations, pressure may be cast on that person to meet those expectations, and quite frankly some people are better suited to be girlfriends and boyfriends, then husbands and wives.

So let me know what you think the difference between a serious relationship and marriage is. Who knows, you may learn something in the process. Ya Dig.